All I Want
by isaacswolfsbane
Summary: Hermione reminisces on her relationship with Draco Malfoy.


**QLFC Round 10 – Forbidden Relationships**

A relationship between two characters in different Houses.

 **Prompts;**

3\. (song) All I Want – Kodaline

13\. (occasion) New Year's Eve party

14\. (word) euphoria

* * *

 _When you said your last goodbye_  
 _I died a little bit inside_  
 _I lay in tears in bed all night_  
 _Alone without you by my side_

 **xxx**

 _Hermione laughed as she looked around the courtyard. Fred and George had decided to hold a New Year's Eve party, both for a bit of fun and to annoy Professor Umbridge. It was beautiful; there was leftover holly and mistletoe from Christmas strewn everywhere, streamers and banners lined the walls and statues, decorations were enchanted to float everywhere. Fred, being who he was, had even enchanted some sprigs of mistletoe to follow some of the students around._

 _"10!" Hermione heard someone shout, starting the countdown to midnight._

 _Looking around she noticed that she'd wandered around so much that she'd lost all of her friends._ Great, _she thought to herself_ , now I'm going to have to kiss some random!

 _"9!"_

 _That was a requirement of a Fred and George New Year's Eve party: everyone had to kiss someone at midnight. She would try to get out of it but somehow they always knew, and when they found out they'd make you regret it, at the very least they'd make some mistletoe follow you around so everyone you spoke to had to kiss you._

 _"8!"_

 _She started walking around, looking for someone she knew so that when midnight rolled around it would be a little less awkward._

 _"7!"_

 _She stopped walking almost immediately; the courtyard was becoming for too packed for her to be able to find any of her friends._

 _"6!"_

 _Closing her eyes she took a deep breath and readied herself for the humiliation that was bound to come after tonight._

 _"5!"_

 _Smiling to herself, she thought of how this would be her first proper kiss. She was going to kiss Viktor the previous year, but Harry and Ron had managed to mess that up completely. All her other kisses had been with a friend at one of Fred and George's New Year's Eve parties._

 _"4!"_

 _Looking ahead of her, she noticed that she was mainly surrounded by first years, well this was going to be awkward._

 _"3!"_

 _Hermione looked to the sky in preparation for the fireworks._

 _"2!"_

 _She tucked a stay strand of hair that had escaped behind her ear. She'd put her hair up similar to how she had done for the Yule Ball the previous year. She figured it was a special event so she should make an effort._

 _"1!"_

 _She smiled as the first of the fireworks went off and every chorused "HAPPY NEW YEAR!"_

 _Suddenly she felt a hand grab her shoulder and spin her round. She let out a small gasp just before she felt a pair of lips pressing onto hers._

 _It was different than she'd expected. All of her previous kisses had been small pecks, but this was different. Whoever it was had deepened this kiss almost immediately, and what was most surprising was that Hermione had gone along with it. It just felt so right._

 _They were kissing for what felt like forever, but it couldn't have been more than a couple of minutes. When she pulled away she realised she'd been kissing the mystery person for longer than anyone else that wasn't in a relationship by the fact that she could see multiple people staring at her. The second thing she realised was that she was in for more humiliation than she had expected as many of the faces she could see were ones of shock, confusion and, in some cases, repulsion._

 _Oh Merlin, who had she kissed?_

 _"Granger?!" she heard a voice snarl at her, confirming her worst fears._

 _"M… Malfoy?" Hermione asked, her face dropping as she turned her head to face the blond boy in front of her that just moments before she had been enjoying kissing. That just moments before had filled her with a joy that was so strong it was almost euphoria._

 _Draco opened his mouth, probably to say some rude remark to her, but Hermione turned and ran before she was able to hear what it was._

Hermione rolled over in her bed, tears springing from her eyes as she remembered the first kiss she shared with Draco. She hated the fact that little things would set her off. It was Harry's 19th birthday and he'd had fireworks at his party. That had made her think of New Year's and the start of her almost year long secret relationship with Draco Malfoy.

 _She wasn't sure exactly how it started, whether it was her or Draco, but they'd just had a potions class and were walking to the Great Hall to lunch and then suddenly they were in a broom closet kissing._

 _Hermione pushed at Draco's chest, "Stop, stop… Malfoy, what are you doing?"_

 _"I think it's called kissing, Granger. Surely you know that?"_

 _"Of course I know that! I mean, why? Why me of all people?"_

 _"I could ask you the same thing, Granger. I wasn't the one who started this."_

 _"Oh of course not, because I would really start kissing you!"_

It hadn't been her who had started it, it was Draco. He'd admitted that he'd been thinking about her since the first time they kissed. She had also found out what Draco was going to say after their kiss. It had taken her a while, but she'd finally gotten him to tell her.

 _"Come on, Draco, just tell me!" she pleaded, using the whining voice she knew annoyed him so much._

 _"Not a chance!" he laughed. He'd been doing more of that since they'd been together, Hermione liked it._

 _"Please!" she cried, dotting kisses across his cheek to try and get him to spill._

 _"Okay fine!" he said, throwing his hands up in defeat, "Not that I want to tell you…"_

 _"Just spill it, Draco!"_

 _"Okay, okay! I was going to say 'Not bad, for a mudblood'. Happy now?"_

 _"Very," Hermione laughed, pulling his face toward her and kissing him._

Hermione sighed as she pulled the duvet closer to her chin. The tears flowed more freely now; the more she thought about Draco, the more she thought about the way they parted.

 _Draco had been being more secretive of late; he'd been spending less time with her since they had returned to school and his letters over summer had gotten more and more vague. Hermione had decided it was time to confront him._

 _"Draco Malfoy! What the hell is going on with you?" Hermione half yelled at him as soon as she got him alone._

 _"What are you talking about, love?" Draco asked. He was trying to come across as normal, but there was something in his tone that was a little off._

 _"You know danm wel what I'm on about! You've been avoiding me, you've been secretive, you barely said a word about yourself in your letters all summer. What's going on?"_

 _"I…" Draco stammered, for once in his life he was lost for words._

 _"If you're going to break up with me just say it, I don't like you being this way!" Hermione was close to tears, but she was refusing to let them spill._

 _"I'm not, I swear. It's just…"_

 _"This better be good, Draco!" Hermione interrupted._

 _"Well it would be if you let me get a fucking word in!" he snapped, shocking Hermione so much that she took a step away from him. "Shit, sorry. I didn't mean that, Hermione…"_

 _"Yes you did! You never do anything you don't mean!"_

 _"I just…"_

 _"Just spit it out Draco!"_

 _"I CAN'T!" he roared, "I wish I could, but I cant. He'll kill me if I do…"_

 _"Draco, stop being an idiot…" Hermione started, but something in Draco's face made her stop; he was being serious._

 _"I'm telling you the truth, Hermione. I can't tell you, or I'll be killed."_

 _"Draco, what's wrong? Tell me please. Who's going to kill you?"_

 _"Voldemort…" Draco whispered in a scared tone._

 _"Draco…"_

 _"Don't, Hermione, just don't. I can't do this any longer. I love you, I do, but… but this is goodbye. I wasn't going to break up with you, but I think it's for the best."_

 _Draco turned and left, leaving Hermione sinking to the floor. She swore she felt a piece of her break as she sat on the floor of the fourth floor corridor sobbing more than she ever had in her life._

Her tears turned into sobs as she remembered their split. How she wished she could have him beside her once more.

* * *

 **Words** : 1,395.

* * *

 **AN:** This wasn't originally meant to be sad, so... um... sorry guys!

Slightly for the wonderful Amy (MissWitchx) partly for creating the perfect round (even if I suck at getting my writing done so it doesn't end up how it should) and slightly as a late birthday present because I was planning on writing you a Dramione for your birthday but haven't got round to it get (because I suck)

xoxo


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